Glad to know him in my life :')

Idk why :(( 

when i saw he very good wih other girls , 

i will very hurt :'( 

i cry whole afternoon just now :'( 

I know he wont come back anymore :'( 

he got his new target now :'( 

i shouldn't go and disturb him :'(

no matter how , 

i must be strong infront of him ! :'( 

i must ! 

i can't let he see that i'm weak :'( 

i can't let him know i'm sad , 

i'm hurt or what else .. 

although he know that he also wont care :'( 

cause he edy give up on me :'( 

what i do for him , 

he also don't care anymore . 

just same like now , 

i change for him , 

but he never knew it <////////////3 . 

i should stay strong :'( 

i think he is gonna chase the girl now :'( 

this afternoon i am alone .. 

i cut myself again :'( 

i am too serious in this relationship :'( 

i want he come back to me ! 

i want him ! 

but all is too late now :'( 

i am so down now :'(

i think he is edy give up on me :'( 

if he cares about me , 

i wont sad now :'( 

i keep lie myself that he will come back tmr :'( 

i put all of the faith on tmr :'( 

BUT .. 

tmr and tmr and tmr .. 

all is still same :'( 

i think i should wake up now :'( 

stop lying myself :'( 

every night i close my eye and after few minutes , 

i will wake up again , 

wake up and think ,

now i do so many things for him , 

is it too late ? 

am i still need to continue do for him ? :'( 

should i ? :'( 

i always ask myself :'( 

but evry times i will answer myself : 

I SHOULD . NO MATTER HOW , I SHOULD CONTINUE DO FOR HIM CAUSE I LOVE HIM :'( 

but .. 

when i saw he chat with other girl til so good . 

SUDDENLY , 

i feel that all i done is NOTHING for him <///////////////////3 . 

shit it :'( 

boy changes heart really fast :'( 

really really fast :'( 

but so what ? :'(

now what i do also ZERO for him :'( 

is not pain for me :'(

cause my heart is more pain than this :'(

</////////////////3

all i want before is HIM .

but now ..

all i want is he get his happiness :'(

i should be mature :'(

he don't love me anymore <////////3

He don't care me anymore <////////3

and he hates me ? :'((

but no matter how , 

i still love him :'(

i know all of this is too late :'((

Oh lord my god :')

i hope he can get his happiness :')

hope he can found his true love :')

i'm sorry to him :')

hope he can get well in his exam :')

hope that got another girl can treat him better than me :')

hope that he wont get hurt anymore :')

please forget all his sins :')

this is first time i so love a boy :') 

please , jesus ,

forgive all his sins :')

let him be a cleanest boy :')

and give him happy everyday :')

hope his family can get happily always and get a healthy body :')

let he and his family peaceful always :')

clean he's and his family' sins :')

all his punishment gives to me :')

this is what i can do for him at the last :')

Amen . :')